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Today is a day for sad songs and despair. Today I revel in my absolute cheesiness and melancholy, because I am, deep inside the hard shell I build around me, a soft and sensitive creature. You poke me and I die.

Today is a day of rejections, remembered and realized; of abandonment, past and foreseen.

Today I remember all my broken hearts – I always make a new one out of the left-over pieces, and it’s never the same. I remember words said and deeds done, I remember the choices made. It’s always the remembering that’s hard.

Funny how I run out of words now - it’s probably because this isn’t the first time I’ve said these kinds of things. But I never knew too many words in the first place. Maybe it would have been easier if I had the gift of gab or if I were blessed with the ability to make grandiose soliloquies and literary expositions, but my ignorance roots me to the dead soil I stand in, so much remains unsaid, undefined. They claw and clamor and groan for release, these things that crave expression; they fill the walls with furrows and their abysmal lamentations echo along the corridors.

Today I look at myself and cringe at my gross immaturity, at how I rant like a 15-year old. Maybe age really has something to do with everything – maybe I’m 24 and I’m trying too hard to act older. Or maybe I am simply one of those people who suffer the misfortune of always being out of place, where ever they go. The weird guy; the annoying guy; the desperately pathetic guy; maybe a combination of all of three.

Today is a day of sad songs, of despair, of frustrations, of realizations, and of memories. Today I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I hate myself for it.


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Photo post

Random shot of the day:

In lieu of my very erratic posting, I've decided to keep this blog (and the connecting one in Multiply as well) alive by posting a shot from my library from time to time. I might also post a short vignette inspired the photo as long as I have the inspiration and the brain power for it.

New Year, new post. LOL.

I suddenly feel compelled all of a sudden to post something in lieu of the New Year--which basically only really means a change of date--and I do realize that it's been AGES since I last put something here.

But what a year 2008 was. It was easily one of the most trying for me emotionally--which I will not expound on; the people who know me know what I'm talking about. But I am still thankful for small joys like good chatting days (and there were lots of bad ones too), Hairspray, airsoft, and eat outs with friends.

Basically I start the year feeling like one of those 9 out of 10 Filipinos they've recently put on the news--hopeful. I hope that this year will be a year of better things, of small and big successes.

Right now, I'm starting to dread Monday--and I'm sure many others feel the same--so I'm trying to maximize what's left of my RPG-playing days before I go back to all that work again.

From Slumdog to Millionaire

Slumdog Millionaire has been getting a lot of hype lately, and I, for one, think it deserves it.

Set in the slums of Mumbai, Slumdog Millionaire is, simply, a rags-to-riches story of a boy who went from the shit-diving fanboy (watch the movie and you'll understand) to the 20 million-Rupee winner of the local version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire - and gets the girl of his dreams in the process. And to make it truly Bollywood-grade (it's a British film, BTW), there's a dance scene at the end.

While some may say that the story is something we've all seen before countless times over and over again (yes, the premise is THAT overused), that's entirely beside the point. No idea is new, they say, the key lies in the way something is presented, which makes Slumdog Millionaire stand out from all the rest. The cinematography for one, is great, and for a movie that reminded me so much of the slums of our own Payatas, of the congestion of this sprawling metropolis we call Met…